Love's Sweet Delusion

It whispers again
Mocking deriding
Sneering accusing
Lambasting chiding

No thing I can do
To remedy this
No action to take
Pain sealed with a kiss

The blinders self made
And fastened on tight
Removed they return
Unlimited sight

All of the deep flaws
I sought to explain
Now meet revulsion
And hurtful distain

Clearly not perfect
I never pretend
Love's sweet delusion
Eventually ends

Stand with clarity
In cold light of day
Held at your arm's length
You push me away

I see the mirror
And I never lied
I sought to explain
I know that I tried

I counted the flaws
I made quite a list
But you wouldn't hear
In your deaf-blind bliss

But now awakened
The knowledge will dawn
Realisation
Feeling you were wrong

But I said clearly
I don't belong here
On this pedestal
While I quaked with fear

Down that pinnacle
Spiralling sickness
Knowing one small bump
Topples with quickness

So soon I would fall
And not into love
Shatter below from
That great height above

I never deceived
Or sought to deny
Knowing all my faults
You sought to decry

Here I stand sobbing
Aware of the truth
But you're the hurt one
Found lacking in ruth

Emotional blows
Land on me like rain
Hot tears now falling
Catalysed by pain

I sought to avoid
An ending as such
Pursued disclosure
After that first touch

The honeymoon ends
Just as it begins
I stand on a pyre
For self-contained sins

A sensitive soul
I know what I am
I know my limits
I know what I can

And what I cannot
Though I long to be
Perfect in your sight
But that isn't me

A squandered moment
Cast upon the floor
Now my broken heart
Will hurt evermore

You sought to assuage
You said you were pained
By my scars and hurts
And those bloody stains

Of old thoughtless wounds
From those who don't care
The lasting impact
Found visibly there

White lines and bruises
Which litter my heart
Sensitive ever
As you trace those marks

Want living hopeful
To believe anew
Handed tenderly
And freely to you

The gift that I gave
Thought you would cherish
Here in reflection
Trust lies now perished