Margaritaville

So then, here is another tale of the world through the eyes of the deranged....

As I have mentioned in other places - I'm slightly neurotic. Only slightly. But it is noteworthy, because I do actively avoid certain things - because they basically skeeve me out.

Note: I am not jewish - but use a lot of yiddish - it is a highly descriptive language. Think about what skeeve should mean - yes that's what it means. On we go...

I'm not a fan of the mall - or anything with pushy people crowding in on me. Unless I am legitimately in a mosh pit, and then it is perfectly OK, because I get to knock you on your a** - and so we are even. But in polite society, I feel compelled to maintain some semblence of decorum, and so when you bump into me, stop in front of me and stare off into space, or otherwise impede or jostle me - my upbringing (see: your mama) is in direct conflict with my desire to choke the living sh*t out of you. It stresses me out and I need to go lay down.

Well, to many of you who read my blogs (it still amazes me that anyone reads this sh*t - but whatever) you know I have only recently begun talking to people I went to high school with.

Some may consider this strange - but my friends were and are outliers. A statistical term for data that lies on or outside the third standard deviation from the mean. What that means, is a group of singular weirdos, possibly nerds, more than likely stoners or surfers and rockers thrown in for good measure and more than a few geniuses who don't conform to anyone's convenient little groups and who have a unique perspective.

I also married a guy who graduated two years ahead of me and he still keeps in touch with all his old friends - whom I love and so I have had no desire to talk to anyone in my class. Except for the people nobody knows. But I always liked JC, and so when he called me ten years ago about the reunion (which I blew off) I kept in touch with him. This has snowballed into getting together with folks in adulthood whom I never really associated with in school. It has been a blast.

So LS - who I never really even talked to in school, had an idea to get together. She is not the best at organizing things - next time I'll have to take a more pro-active position and get involved sooner. That doesn't mean a good time wasn't had by all - but we could have had more people.

Likewise - I should call ahead to make sure the restaurant I recommended is still open.

But apparently whenever a party is considered, ML and GBF are dependable - and they are sure to show and that's always a good thing. He is on my must invite list.

So, my hubby and I get to the restaurant - I recommended - and it is closed. Not closed for the day - or closed for renovations. Closed the f down. For good - sign on the door - thanks, good night. So here we both are in the parking lot - going 'Oh sh*t' and now the phone calls must start.

ML was first, and he recommends Carlos and Pepes. Sounds OK - never been there. Then JC, he shares that the place was on dirty dining. OK. Now what. I can't even watch that without puking and here we are GOING THERE?!?!?!?!?

Breathe.

Don't panic.

OK, here comes ML, maybe we should discuss this. I can't get LS 'cause her phone is broken and she's sure not to be home anymore - so I leave a Post-it on the door - by the "Closed for Business" sign and we are off.

Ultimately, I decide that I'm just having drinks - so how disgusting could that be.

Well, those were some damned delicious margaritas. I'm a cheapo - so the next party will have to be at the 6300 club, 'cause my budget isn't OK with $70.00 for margaritas. I can get a LOT of limes for $70.00. Lincoln.

I have a bladder like a freakin' camel. I can consume large quantities of water, etc without having to go often. I drink tons of water every day and have for a long time - so after the first week or so of running to the loo every two minutes, it stopped. But after 3 margaritas and two glasses of water I had to pee. So into the loo I go. OH MY GOD!!!! I would rather have peed in the woods. It was disgusting!!!! OH MY GOD!!!! I needed to wipe my feet to step outside.... EW YUCK! But I have to go - I take the handicapped stall and use the bars to not touch anything - and the door doesn't even close - OH MY GOD!!!! Toilet paper everywhere - all over the floor, stuff on the seats, OH MY GOD!!!! I didn't even want to touch the sink to wash my hands - I seriously considered possibly skipping it, because I thought it might actually be cleaner. I couldn't though - I just can't skip that, but I very gingerly washed up (almost twice, but didn't want to touch the soap dispenser or sink again) and used the paper towel to open the door to leave without touching anything. I'm not a germaphobe, but I would prefer not to catch something....and something was probably growing in there

LS treated us to some of the most expressive tales of semi-drunken adventure I have ever seen - and I think I have a new friend. She is just way too much like me. Too funny. GBF, as always, was a lady - she is a glutton for details - her presence ensures a good time. ML, a margarita purist, must come by the 6300 club so we can throw down properly.

We both had a long day starting with driving two hours to Vero Beach to install cabinets on the Sun (see: your mama). And then rushed off to the closed restaurant for drinks. M went right to bed. I wanted to go to Rickey's but couldn't bring myself to go alone. And so I went and picked up teenager number two from his friends' house and we stayed up playing the vagina game.

He is good.

We laughed our asses off.

He's such a cool kid. Most kids don't open up - I'm blessed.

Don't forget to tip your waitress.